Parenting is such a verbal activity, isn't it? For someone who is a "words of affirmation" person (check out "The 5 Love Languages" book if you don't know what I'm talking about!), words mean a lot to me...and yet, if I am not careful and intentional with my parenting, careless words can slip out of my own mouth that cause harm instead of encouraging words that help me lead my kids closer to Christ.
Before staying home with our kids, I (Lauren) worked in the corporate world of audit and consulting and from there, transitioned into public speaking consulting and entrepreneurship. One of the lessons that has stuck with me over the years from a public speaking training class I presented in, was about how people in the audience (for our purposes, we can say our kids) receive the message sent by the speaker (parents).
In short, messages are sent in 3 channels:
1. Verbal (the actual words we say)
2. Vocal (the tone in which we say it)
3. Visual (how we look when we say it).
Overall, the research suggests that in a corporate public speaking setting, how you say what you're saying (vocal) and how you look when you're saying it (visual) are overwhelmingly more important (like 93%!) than the actual words coming out of your mouth!!
Now…I have been ruminating on that data point a LOT as I have thought through important phrases (verbal words we use!) that have made an impact on my own personal parenting style as we have sought to instill Biblical truths in our everyday vernacular. And I just have to say...in the world of parenting, I believe our words have a lot more weight with our kids than we realize!
As opposed to the environment you have with young kids at home of constant interaction and opportunities for teachable moments, you often only have one shot to deliver your message in a corporate presentation setting. In parenting, we have lots of opportunities to share meaningful messages with our kids that will stick with them as they leave to go to school or other social settings.
I’m sure you’ve already realized this after having kids but in case you haven’t noticed…
Parenting is all about repetition! I mean, how many times does one have to say, "Flush, and wash, and be on your way!" after the kids use the potty?? (Thanks Daniel Tiger). I digress.
The point is: Purposeful phrases help us center on core truth principles and lay a foundation on which we can build upon for future (tougher, more complicated) situations and conversations as our children grow up.
Whether or not we get our tone right or look pleasant when we are telling our children for the umpteenth time not to squeeze the dog so hard he yips or not to yank things out of someone else’s hands or not to be demanding…we can lay a firm foundation now that will benefit us and our kids as they grow.
Which is actually why I stepped into the Lord’s prompting for me to start this blog!
Friends, I am a fellow sojourner along with you in the trenches of raising kids up in the way of the Lord. With two kids age 8 and 5, I am passionate about starting off well and I want to share everything I am learning with you so you can be inspired to start off your kids well in your home also.
Combining my unique background of finance, audit, and entrepreneurship with a fascination of operational process improvement has created a passion in me for turning things that are complex and theoretical into things that concise and tangible.
In short…I like to make the complex concise and the theoretical tangible!
When I first decided to stay home with my oldest, I thought this skill-set would be of no use. I mean, how efficient and effective is managing an infant with no self-control and no ability to follow directions? But much like good cheese gets better with age, this skill-set that I thought would not be useful until I “got out into the workforce again” has proved to be something I could put into action under our own roof.
The Lord quickly revealed to me when the COVID global pandemic shut down all of our normal routine activities in 2020 that this passion would be perfect for imparting our faith in Jesus to our children and training them up in the ways of the Lord.
And now, I want to share those processes and tangible, concrete examples with you!
Since having our oldest almost 9 years ago, I have had exposure to lots of different Biblical parenting material involving concepts, theories, and examples of how to implement them in the home. Unfortunately, I often found that the application was either not age appropriate (i.e. – stressing the importance of giving choices to young kids but giving examples for kids in middle school) or the theory had no tangible example for me to understand how to action it in my own home (i.e. – “You shouldn’t say/do XYZ…” without giving an example of what to do instead)!
God has placed a calling on my heart to:
Take this knowledge that I have accumulated over the last 9 years from a variety of Biblical sources, like works by Turanksy & Miller from the National Center for Biblical Parenting, studies from Chip Ingram (who focused his MDiv graduate thesis on Parenting), messages from Tim Keller, sermons from my home church by Tim Hawks, and more!
Zero in on application for parents of kids all ages, and
Use the skills He has given me for turning theory into practice to create something that can inspire other parents in their journey as well
My hope is that this blog, Nesting on the Rock, can be a place of encouragement and motivation for parents of young kids that enables them to build a firm foundation (nest) for their family on the truth of Scripture and the teachings of Christ (the rock)! I hope you will see it as a gathering place of Biblical wisdom which leaves you refreshed and motivated to apply truth in your home.
I am so excited to embark on this journey with you and can’t wait to see how the Lord inspires you to build your rock-solid nest!
~Lauren
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